Freda Mary Kennedy 1

Freda Mary Kennedy 12 Jun 1918 to 11 Apr 2002. (Written by Philip Kennedy)

On behalf of my sisters and brothers Kathie, John, Buddy (Andrew), Liz, Helen (Poss) Marie together with our spouses Kevin, Hilary, Margaret, Greg, Des, Joyce and Michael and our families, we thank you all for being here today for this final farewell mass for our dear Mum, Freda Mary, Nanny Frede, Nan or big Nan as she was variously called. Many of you will have known Mum personally but others here as our friends, work colleagues or community representatives may not have met her. Whatever the case, let me assure you that Mum was a great person.

We thank Father Morley and his assistants in Sacred Heart Parish for preparing today’s mass and also to Brian Bourchier in making the funeral arrangements hassle free for us.

We also thank the nursing staff and carers at the Wilkinson wing Nursing Home for their care of Mum for the time spent in their care.



Mum was born Freda Mary Martin at Benalla on 12 June 1918. She was the third child of James (JT) and Sophia Martin. Two of Mum's sisters died at a very early age but the other two, May Trewin and Kath Downes are here with us today. Both Aunty May and Aunty Kath have been a good friend to Mum all her life as well as being her sister.

Mum's Childhood home was "Emoh ruo" which is just 2 miles south of Devenish and is also within 3 miles from the cemetery where we will lay her to rest. Indeed Aunty May still lives in the original homestead.

Mum's schooling was at Devenish West and all her growing up was centred around Devenish and Goorambat.

In 1941 she married Dad, Joseph Kennedy.

They made their home in Devenish until 1950 when they moved to St James where Mum ran a Milk Bar and Dad farmed.

By Australia Day 1953 Mum and Dad's family of 7 children was complete.

Together Mum and Dad provided a secure and loving home environment for what was a relatively relaxed rural upbringing for each of us. With such a big family there was always someone to keep you occupied and the shop and the farm meant there was no time to sit around being idle.

We all have childhood memories, Sunday mass was always a bit of a logistics operation in my recollection. Mass was at Devenish. I recall the 9 of us piling into our 1954 Plymouth Cranbrook with its column shift and front bench seat. Front seating was usually Mum, Dad, Marie and myself and the backseat was Kathie, John, Buddy, Liz and Poss. Now while that seems straightforward, the issue was keeping tabs on whose turn it was to sit back and who should sit forward! 3 back and 2 forward had to be the configuration. It was probably the original Catholic bus. We certainly would not have met today’s safety requirements with seat belts etc.
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Life continued normally until movements out of home started for work or college. Marriages then followed and as you can see up the front of the church here grandchildren started to arrive. Freda's legacy is large but of prime importance to her was her family. Grandchildren number 31 starting in 1964 (39 years) down to 1995 (7 years). The majority of the Grand children will well remember the personally addressed letter they received on their birthdays containing a card, a handkerchief and a $2 note. In addition, there are presently 24 Great Grandchildren ranging from 10 yrs to just 12 days. Unfortunately Mum was not really aware of the vast majority of her GG children because of her deteriorating health.

Mum's world was turned upside down in 1973 when Dad died suddenly from a heart attack at just 57 years of age.

This required a change of role for Mum in suddenly having to run the farm. While she was capable and with the help of family and neighbours she did manage it well, she was happy to sell the farm.

Mum's time in St James involved her in many community activities particularly the Bowling Club (of which she and Dad were foundation members) and golf. In later years she became a regular at playing cards in Tungamah.

At home she was an avid crossword fan and scrabble was a game she enjoyed. Kathie's husband Kevin and Helen's husband Des were her benchmark opponents and they had many tussles between them. There was frequently a post mortem as to whether a particular word was legitimate and if it hadn't been allowed what particular result might have eventuated. Television quiz shows were also of interest to her.

The loss of Dad as a companion and confidante led Mum to choose to frequently call all of us on the telephone as a means of filling an obvious void. Let me tell you, Telecom, as it then was, was a big beneficiary of that.

I recall that in those years it was not unusual for Mum's quarterly telephone bill to approach $1000. Indeed her ability to get a message around the family almost rivalled present day email efficiency. Our cousin Paul (Tiche) Flood often comments on the KCN (Kennedy Communication Network) of which Freda was the very hub and expert operator.

The irony of all this was that Freda's great communication skills were the very thing that she lost in her final unrewarding years. Her lack of use of the phone was a discerning barometer for us of this decline. Formerly, she was a person who could engage in conversation with anyone, she was not in awe of anyone, she made people feel comfortable, she would always acknowledge you, always had an inviting and welcoming smile and you could share a laugh and a joke with her. She was simply pleasant to be with and you could not help but respect her. While she had strong views and opinions she was not one to force her opinion upon you. She did strive to achieve harmony and peace in uncomfortable situations.

Aside from this great disposition, she was a great cook and seamstress. She also liked figures and was frequently sorting through her finances and doing 'what ifs'. Plants and flowers were another interest she had. She particularly liked the row of standard roses she had at the side of the driveway in St James.

On the cooking front she always made great roasts and other main meals, but her specialty in my eyes was her preparation of sweets and cakes. The ones that still make my mouth water are her Plum sago pudding, lemon meringue pie and jam or apple roly poly while the cakes include apple cake, napoleon slice, fresh warm jam roll, lamingtons and jelly cakes and the one which was my very favourite, ginger cake. Indeed there were numerous times when Mum knew I would be visiting her that she would cook a ginger cake and have a cuppa with me and send the remainder of the cake home with me supposedly for me to share with my family.

The importance of family has always been paramount to Mum and I think it is her influence in particular that we are what I would call a close family. For such a large family it is pleasing for us, as it was for Mum, that all the cousins know each other and enjoy each others company at gatherings.

Mum was fortunate that her 2 sisters were close to her as was dad's sister Mary Flood who lived in St James. Mary is here with us today as are Mum's other living sisters and brothers in-law Jimmy and Pat, Delma and Mickey. We acknowledge the loyalty and love which they have shown Mum over the years as did those of her in laws who are deceased.

The first signs that Mum's capacity to remain on her own in St James became evident following a period where she was having what she called "whizzies" which were clearly the beginnings of a dementia condition. Her capacity to remember things was deteriorating. A particular instance which I recall was when she was withdrawing some money to pay for the painting of the house roof. She required $700 but she actually made out a withdrawal for $7000. Thanks to a vigilant bank teller in Tungamah, Liz was contacted and the matter was quickly sorted out. Clearly, living in a smaller community and being well known helped in this situation.

It was around that time that we began taking steps to move Mum to a situation where she could be more closely watched but still retaining some independence. At Mum's own request she was keen to stay in the area. Fortunately Liz and Greg generously agreed to have a granny flat established adjacent to their house on the farm at Burramine. That decision, based on geography, created a disproportionate responsibility on Liz and Greg and their boys, Bernie, Dom, Joe and Marcus. As a family though the rest of us will be ever grateful for what the Connell’s did for Mum.

That arrangement worked very well for a period of time. Mum continued with her cards at Tungamah but as she deteriorated she then began activities at the community centre in Yarrawonga, with a bus picking her up for these outings. Her communication continued to deteriorate and this also had to cease. Eventually it became clear that full time nursing care was necessary. With the help of the staff from the nursing home we secured a place in Cobram mid 2000, with the intention of transferring Mum back to Yarrawonga if and when an opportunity arose.

The opportunity did occur and since Jan 2001 Mum has been a resident of the Wilkinson wing where she died on Thursday.

We know this is the end but for Kathy, John, Buddy, Liz, Poss, Marie and myself we are comforted by the fact that we can truly say Mum treated us all equally and from the moment of our respective births until her death she was, for us, that one person in the world who unconditionally loved each of us.

We hope we have and can continue to live up to the example she has shown us and that it is also passed on to our large and growing families.

It is now time to say goodbye.

We have loved her in life and you can be sure we will not forget her in death.

May our Mum rest in peace.